No one can hurt you without your consent

The title of this post is actually a quote by Eleanor Roosevelt. I came across this piece few days back. I found it really interesting.

I don’t know how true this story is, but it is pretty good.

On the first day, as President Abraham Lincoln entered to give his inaugural address, just in the middle, one man stood up. He was a rich aristocrat. He said, “Mr. Lincoln, you should not forget that your father used to make shoes for my family.” And the whole Senate laughed; they thought they had made a fool of Abraham Lincoln.

But Lincoln — and that type of people are made of a totally different mettle. Lincoln looked at the man and said, “Sir I know that my father used to make shoes in your house for your family, and there will be many others here…. Because the way he made shoes; nobody else can. He was a creator. His shoes were not just shoes; he poured his whole soul in it. I want to ask you, have you any complaint? Because I know how to make shoes myself. If you have any complaint I can make another pair of shoes. But as far as I know, nobody has ever complained about my father’s shoes. He was a genius, a great creator and I am proud of my father”.

The whole Senate was struck dumb. They could not understand what kind of man Abraham Lincoln was. He was proud because his father did the job so well that not even a single complaint had ever been heard.

Remember:
“No one can hurt you without your consent.”

“It is not what happens to us that hurts us. It is our response that hurts us.”

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4 thoughts on “No one can hurt you without your consent

  1. Interesting story. This is not the case with physical abuse. Some parents and spouses physically assault their children and spouses. They don’t seek consent and lack of choices to walkout of an abusive situation throws the concept of consent out of the window. Now coming to the emotional abuse and constant name calling erodes a person’s self confidence and the statement “Nobody can make you feel bad without your consent,” holds no good either. Though I advocate it all the time because I am no longer in those situations.

    Peace,

    Desi Gilr

    • Hi,
      When I posted this I didn’t meant it to deal with physical violence. Physically assaulting children and spouses is one of the worst kind of violence along side heinous crimes like rape.

      “Nobody can make you feel bad without your consent” will hold good only when you are proud and confident about yourself and you will not let somebody else bully you around for fun.

      You can’t expect others to fight for you till you learn to fight for yourself.

  2. You can’t expect others to fight for you till you learn to fight for yourself. Who said that? You sound very defensive.

    Desi Girl was just trying to widen the horizon of this discussion by suggesting physical violence has a very big emotional factor. Denial and shock are initial aftermaths of physical assault they make the person numb to even fight for a flight. Even the proudest and confident people when physically assaulted scumb to pangs of low esteem.

    Though each one of us have to fight our own battles but it is also important to fight for those who cannot due to centuries of opression- be it gender, caste, class on and on…

    Peace

    • Looks like my urgency to reply has send out wrong meaning. Let me be honest I haven’t had to face any physical violence, which might explain my belief. I was not defensive because in the very first line I have admitted I didn’t think of Physical violence while posting this.

      “Though each one of us have to fight our own battles but it is also important to fight for those who cannot due to centuries of oppression- be it gender, caste, class on and on”

      I completely agree with you, but the truth is if we don’t fight for our rights, we would have to suffer more. There are tons of people you are willing to fight for others but how will they know if nobody informs them. That is all I meant.

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