Arsenal 2-1 Barcelona

For those who missed the action.

I picked up some funny jokes going around about this match.

1) Looking back at that first-half performance, perhaps it was a mistake to give the Arsenal fans white flags to wave before kick-off.

2) An Arsenal fan proposed to his girlfriend on the pitch at half-time. Apparently, he was inspired to do so by watching Xavi and Iniesta run rings round his team’s midfield.

3) The second half turn-around was as brilliant as it was unexpected. Surely not even Arsene Wenger would have seen it coming (although that’s not saying much – he hasn’t admitted to seeing anything at a football match for the past 15 years). (A potshot at Arsene Wenger’s usual comment “I did not see it”)

4) Then again, you would expect a team built on a foundation of Busquets to crumble under pressure…

5) It was a mixed performance from Leo Messi, who had such a bad game in front of goal that Roman Abramovich(Chelsea Owner) is considering putting in a £50million bid for him in the summer.

6) Cesc Fabregas refused to get carried away after the game, telling reporters: “It was an unexpected result, but I’m sure we can turn it around in the second leg.” (This one is worthy of George W. Bush)

7) The Arsenal skipper was quick to swap shirts at the end of the game though. Apparently, Cesc wanted a Barcelona away shirt to go with the home one Pepe Reina gave him after the World Cup.

8 ) The big positive for Arsenal: Barcelona have ended their interest in Cesc Fabregas. Unfortunately they now want to sign Jack Wilshere…

Picked it up from mirrorfootball.co.uk. It is written by Dan Silver.

Towards a Modernized Currency System for India

I got this one from Sreeprakash.

Some interesting currency units being proposed.

Lakhs & Crores no longer work – too many zero’s to handle – so we talk of Lac crores etc
As part of Globalization, one unit which works best is $Billion, which also makes it easier for all to benchmark against their local systems
But for India another simpler system also emerges:

New Units of Money

The huge amounts mentioned in the recent scams have an upside: they have given us convenient new units for communicating large figures:

Rs.1,000 crores= 1 Radia
Rs.10,000 crores= 1 Kalmadi
Rs.1,00,000 crores= 1 Raja

This will make it easier for us to comprehend and communicate large numbers. For example:

Anil Ambani’s new home in Pali Hill will cost Rs 4.5 Radias
India’s total annual subsidy on kerosene is Rs 2 Kalmadis
ONGC’s annual output is worth Rs 1.2 Rajas
India’s loss in the 2G scam is approximately Rs 1.7 Rajas
Poor Pramod Mahajan left behind only Rs 1.4 Radias

Financial Management

A beggar to another beggar: I had a grand dinner at Taj Mahal Palace yesterday.

How? The other beggar asked.

First beggar: Some one gave me a Rs 100/- note yesterday.

I went to Taj and ordered dinner worth Rs 1,000/-, and enjoyed the dinner. When the bill came, I said, I had no money.

The Taj manager called the policeman, and handed me over to him.

I gave the Rs 100/- note to the policeman, and he set me free.

A wonderful example of financial management indeed :)

I had got this from Pearl Fernandes.

Bunking Brothers – Caught in the act

I wrote this post with lots of help from Mahesh Mahadevan.

This is a sequel to The inspiration. In their association of 2 years, the Bunking brothers were caught only once and Vishvesh was partially responsible. Lets me tell you this story.

It was an another lazy afternoon which had a boring session of Engineering and Technology Management(ETM) taken by the Head of Department. He had a very good habit of keeping his sessions in the first hour after lunch which enabled all students in his class to have a very good nap after their lunch. The problem was, he didn’t want the students to sleep.

Bunking Brothers had their lunch and sat in class thinking over the options available. Normally they had only two options

1. Stay in the class and sleep
2. Watch a really good movie in the hostel

Knowing how much they hated the subject(ETM) the decision was always option number 2. But this day was different Vishvesh decided to stay back and Mahesh grudgingly agreed to stay back too.

The grandmaster(Nishanth) for clever enough to go missing from the class during the lunch break.

And then Ashish turned up.

Ashish : Hi Mahesh, can you please give me company to the computer lab, I need to look for something.

Bunking brothers were always compassionate and would go to any extent to help their friends.

Mahesh: Why company, I will give you factory and industry dude, come let’s go.

Mahesh convinced Vishvesh to come along to the lab. The lab provided complete access to internet and most of the guys spent time on social networking sites and as usual it turned out to be a long wait for the bunking brothers while Ashish was busy with his work.

While they were waiting for Ashish, devil had started a new process in Vishvesh’s mind and he started thinking about bunking the class. This was one thing most people hated about Vishvesh, he would give right suggestions at wrong times. He liked to do things late, in this case very late.

As Ashish was doing this stuff. Vishvesh now convinced Mahesh to bunk and they went back to class to get their bags so that they could go to hostel.

Mahesh was pretty sure that Ashish was chatting with ladies and he was curious to know who those ladies were, so they walked into the lab again and Mahesh was utterly disappointed to find him searching for seminar topics. Soon they realized that it was time for post lunch session.

Mahesh: Guys, it’s time to go. It’s HOD’s class now

Vishvesh: It’s almost time, Lecturers will be in the corridor. It will be risky lets wait for 5 minutes

Ashish: Come on guys, you are here all you have to do is to walk for 2 minutes and you will be in the class. Why do you have to bunk?

Mahesh: We have come too far, we can’t return now.

Vishvesh : Our actions are like an atomic operation, either this way or that way. We have prepared to go to hostel and hostel it would be. You can always join us.

Ashish walked away knowing very well that convincing the bunking brothers to attend class was Mission Impossible and he wasn’t Tom Cruise either. The bunking brothers stayed back in the lab. And after 15 minutes they decided to get out of the lab. They had just stepped out of the lab door and stopped. Right in front of them was a professor. The professor for surprised to see them in lab with theirs bags when a class was going on. Cool as the brothers were, there weren’t anything like the grandmaster, who could poke a sleeping dragon in the eye and live to tell the tale.

The professor looked surprised and after blankly staring at them for couple of second professor finally spoke.

Professor : What are you doing here?

Vishvesh : We had come to the lab…….
(Mahesh was thinking, isn’t it obvious that we are still outside the lab.)

Professor : I can see that, but why are you guys still here?

(Vishvesh was speech less, quickly thinking over what to say and Mahesh cashed in.)

Mahesh : I had come here to fix the image corruption issue in my steganography project. I could not fix the issue, So I thought Vishvesh and Ashish could help me fix the issue, so I brought them here.

Professor : Where is Ashish? Is he still inside the lab?

Vishvesh : No, He went to class. We got delayed since we were compiling the code.

Professor : You guys don’t know how to manage time. Your HOD has prepared power point presentation for your class and is planning to take class for three consecutive hours and you guys are here!
(Vishvesh looked as if he could puke at any moment)

Mahesh : We are going to the class, We had spoken to HOD before coming here.
(Professor looked at them suspiciously, fortunately for them they had good reputation)

Professor : Okay.
(Mahesh and Vishvesh had heaved a sigh of relief, but professor shocked them again)

Professor : Anyway I have to go to ground floor too, you guys carry on I will be right behind you two.
(Thinks couldn’t get any worst than this, attending a single hour of HOD’s class for painful enough but 3 consecutive hours has to be the worst possible nightmare)

Saying so the professor went inside the lab and in no time came out. The bunking brothers had started walking back to the class and the professor was walking right behind them, there was no way to escape this time round. The brothers had been caught in the act and their punishment would be to attend three hours of ETM saga(torture).

They walked down the staircase disheartened and had come down to the second floor and there they could hear rampaging foot steps and in no time the staircase was filled with about 60 – 70 freshers running towards their labs. Professor started telling them off.

Sensing opportunity Vishvesh pulled Mahesh’s shirt and directed him to go towards the corridor on the right instead of the going down stairs. Taking cue from Vishvesh, Mahesh started walking towards the corridor on the right towards the back stairs. They coolly walked through the corridor and walked straight out of college through the back stairs.

College of horror

The bunking brothers went to hostel and enjoyed watching movies for 3 hours and rest of the students were left watching the college turn into a horror house. The students who attended the session named the session as Class of horror. It was later found out that the power point presentations were downloaded from the net.

Bunking brothers were involved in lots of other adventures and in time those stories would also be told.